BALDERDASH

Life is a bitch, as they say. Perhaps it is our fault, considering how many things we take for granted, even after all those repeated lessons destiny taught us- however hard... But if not hope, what else made us act the part in this drama called life? Hope, is like alchohol- addictive, pleasure-giving, but too dangerous in large quantities. We realise it, and continue being addicted.

It is surprising how anyone can underestimate the power of smile. Smile- that i try to avoid when i just want to say 'no'. Smile- with all its regular meanings. Above all, smile- with which i try to say 'i wish...'. Pain- is what I define as not seeing that smile when i desperately want to. How I wish human beings could read smiles. As long as you can't, I call it divine; for me, that is what God is all about.

Speaking of God, how easily I fluctuate from theist to agnostic to atheist. I always thought that atheists are born either out of 'content'(ment) or 'contempt'. For me, it was always contempt. The ease with which I forget things- ah! the ungrateful me. Am I? I wish gratitude could be measured in tears, gallons of them.

It is all the fault of love- the manifestations of it called mother, father... the habit of dreaming about fairies, colours... and believing that i was all that i never was. No, they never cheated, they really did believe that too- the first of those follies of love...

I really do sound stupid. I call it being philosophical. They are interconnected, i say- It is when you realise how stupid you have been that you talk gibberish and name it philosophy!